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How to be the most confident, sexy you

You know those people you feel drawn to because they just seem so happy and at ease? You know those days when you just flow through life and everything goes right?

It’s easy to think those people were just born that way. Or that the amazing day you had was just a fluke. But anyone, including you, can learn to tap into that state of feeling. And boy, does it feel good when you do!

There’s nothing more attractive than someone who’s on a natural high.

You don’t have to be the smartest, funniest, richest or prettiest person in the room. All you need to do is embrace and own yourself fully. Be not afraid to let the true you shine. For some that might mean you become the centre of attention, for others you may be happier on the sidelines, but will still have an irresistible draw to you because you’re happy in that space.

So how to cultivate these feelings?

Well lucky for you, this girl’s got a five stage plan.

​1. Work out the essence of who you are…

What makes you feel good? What lights you up? What are you happiest doing? What annoys you the most? What are your most important values? Who brings out the best in you? Take some time to get to know the real, unadulterated you.

2. Start embracing that essence

Are you living in alignment with the essence of who you are? Are you doing the things that make you happy? Are you living according to your values? Are you spending time with people who make you feel good? If not, what can you differently so you are.

3. Let go of worrying about what other people think about you

Nothing takes us out of ourselves more than worrying about what other people think about us. I spent my secondary school years stuck in this pattern and it didn’t do me any favours and starting to ruin my self-esteem. When you’re forcing yourself to act in a way that you think will draw other people to you, you’re not being you. And others will sense that lack of authenticity. Trust that by being you, you’ll attract the right people for you.

4. Look after yourself

Get enough sleep. Go for the massage you’re craving. Eat foods that make you feel good. Don’t feel guilty about doing nothing and letting yourself rest and recover. Manage your stress levels. Say no to things you don’t want to do.

5. Practice in small ways

It’s likely going to take a hella lot of effort to suddenly march into a room like a radiant butterfly. But small acts build up quickly, and will likely get you there much faster. Start doing one thing that makes you feel really good about yourself today. The build on it. Then let go and be more you when you’re out in social situations - just like you would after a couple of glasses of wine.

If you need any more convincing...

I pulled a brazilian model this word of a lie! Waking up after a night out in Peru, I fancied doing something with my day. Not being able to force my travel companion to do, well anything, I donned my favourite hoody, scraped my hair back and headed off to explore the city solo. I was drawn to the cathedral steps and stopped to just sit on them and just BE. It felt so good to be out doing what I wanted without an agenda. And hey presto, a brazilian model comes over and starts talking to me, and insists on us spending the rest of the day together and coming out with us all that evening. Still one of my hottest success stories - no make-up, no hair, no sexy outfit needed…

An important note for women of our time

In the highly masculine world we can find ourselves in, particularly for those women smashing it in the corporate world, it’s never been more important to remember that we are women. To embrace our feminine side and use it to balance out the masculine side that gets us through high pressure meetings and deadlines. Taking time out, resting, doing the things that make you feel “girly” are all going to help you return to your natural essence. To be more you.

And the more you, you are, the more confident, sexy and irresistible you will be!

If you're in Dubai and you’d like to delve into this topic deeper, gaining a deeper understanding of who you are and what you need from a relationship in order to thrive, join me next Tuesday, 12 November for a FREE workshop. It starts at 7.30pm at the House of Om and you can find out more details and sign up here.


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